I hate when I accidentally send texts to the wrong people cuz of the ball park franks on my hands that I call fingers. 2 hours ago
You know you're entirely too gay when half of your newsfeed is posting about the Les Mis trailer... and most of them are dudes. 2 hours ago
So, like, a dance party by yourself to Forever Young is cool, right? Cuz my dog is kinda looking at me like I'm lame and I'm not havin' it. 20 hours ago
... it hurt a little more since I had just finished half of a pizza when I saw that suggestion. 21 hours ago
Facebook suggested I "Like" Eat. Besides the horrible grammatical implications, I'm not as big of a fat ass as Facebook keeps suggesting. 21 hours ago
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